The Baretta

Recently I was working with a client who's SharePoint 2010 environment had been poorly managed for years.  They had a single site collection on a single, large content database (650GB).  Not uncommon, however this environment also occasionally froze up, never loading any of the pages on any sites until an IISRESET was performed on the Web Front End (WFE). It started off only happening once a month, then moved to once a week, a few times a week, to 5-10 times a day... Begin Troubleshooting: The issue was around too many lists, and items within those lists having their own permissions. Each permission for an item counts as one row in the RoleAssignment table in the database. apparently they say a healthy DB will only have 200,000 rows in that table. Ours had 10,000,000 rows (You can check this by right-clicking the Database in SQL Management Studio and clicking Reports > Disk Usage by Top Tables.  Then look for the RoleAssignment Table).  and every time...

This is how bad it is to actually have to walk into shops and try and order something nowadays. The bonnie lass & I recently scored a $100 Adairs* gift card and thought it was about time to go purchase something fancy with the "cash".  Normally we'd just look online, which we did, but we couldn't use the gift card online.  So we headed off to the Analog store.  After perusing the store for quite some time and being unimpressed with the range & the prices, we decided upon a quilt cover that we thought suited our needs. After the store clerk tried calling multiple Adairs' stores in the region, it turned out they didn't have the quilt cover in our size (the ever illusive Queen size quilt).  No bother, we went back to the wall and chose another quilt cover that we were reasonably happy with. Oh what's that you say?  You checked out the back, tried calling a few stores and you don't have a Queen in this print either? hmmm.  OK.  Well fuck it,...